Struggling HOT MESS over here!!!

Satan has been all over this house this week!

I have felt so heavy and just down right uncomfortable in my own skin this week (or more).   There has been excessive fighting, yelling, groundings, un-groundings.

I spent a lot of time thinking while I was painting tonight.   I was am hoping that this bathroom project would bring me some peace and teach me some patience. I have been begging  praying for patience for years. God is yet to hit me over the head with Patience wand. I mean trust me, his has given me 9million chances to practice, but alas, I always fail MISERABLY.

SO, tonight while I was painting,  I spent some time watching this enamel paint.  #1 enamel paint, is the slowest drying paint in History of the world. No matter how much I want it to hurry the crap up, nothing is going to make it take less than 24-36 hrs to dry.  NOTHING!!  ( I can't rush GOD)   Enamel paint is so thick.  You have to really work with it. You have to try and try to make sure the imperfections don't show. You have to be patient to allow time for the paint to spread into the cracks and crevices and take over the project.  (IF I GIVE GOD TIME AND ALLOW HIM, HE WILL SPREAD INTO EVERY AREA OF MY LIFE)  .  One of the nice things about painting is the ability to clean up spills. Mineral Spirits, is an amazing invention. It has the ability to wash things clean. (My Lord is willing to wipe the slate clean for me!, WHAT??)   I have always wanted to be one of those people who didn't have to "abuse the privilege" of constant forgiveness. But, instead I am in need of constant Grace and Forgiveness. 

I AM A HOT MESS!!

There are things I can control but don't,  the way I should. The color of my words, the intensity of my speech, the way I let things affect my attitude.  I need a big makeover of my own.  Like my little house, I am a work in progress.....................